The Pepsi Vending Machine At KATU:

This is the PepsiCo vending machine at KATU in the so-called "Coffee Shop".

I would like to list the choices you are so generously offered:

Cans:

6 Diet Pepsi

3 Pepsi

Comments: Are you kidding me? I can have either, ad nauseum? Sweet!

Next Shelf:

6 choices of Gatorade, all Blueberry Pomegranate G2

3 cans of Red Bull, $2.25 each

Comments: that blue Gatorade shit tastes like rotten yogurt, and health-conscious K2 employees won't drink all that Red Bull for the next 20 weeks

Now to the three shelves of 20 oz. bottles:

3 Diet Mountain Dew

3 Lipton Iced Tea (lemon)

2 Mountain Dew Code Red

1 Pepsi

Comments: nowhere on this list, or any of the following, is there actual Mountain Dew, but we got all the fringe Dews you can handle.

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3 Diet Pepsi

Another bottle of Mountain Dew Code Red

1 Lipton Diet Green Tea

Another bottle of Lipton Iced Tea (lemon)

3 Diet Dr. Peppers

Comments: similar to the previous comments, there is no actual Dr. Pepper anywhere in this machine, but shorter people can still read the labels of choices they can't reach farther up.

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3 more bottles of Pepsi

6 bottles of Aquafina water

Comments: turn around 180° and there's free water. How about some fucking choice?

Overall take: the selections in this vending machine are disrespectful to KATU employees.